on
December 18, 2006

today is but a page, in a chapter, in the story of our lives.

an overwhelming bombardment of feelings stirs so many thoughts. such random triggers that invoke contemplantive moods. thinking about the past, present and future. so many mistakes made, so many left to make. on the otherhand, what lies in store around the corner? good or bad, it will come. the winds of time blow, bringing with them an ever-moving state of change. welcome to our world, the world of humanity. a world where you will walk by another person and think

they never feel what I feel.

how wrong we are. we are led to believe that the world revolves around us and how we are feeling. we feel isolated, alone and like no one understand but the reality is, everyone goes through similar feelings and circumstances, but you’d never know by just looking at them. were all good at wearing masks and putting on a smile for others to see. we never really let on how were truly feeling unless it’s with those we trust but even then, they might not understand.

on the contrary, no one knows how you feel but you. we are unique in who we are and how we feel. there are different emotions for all of us and different things that trigger those emotions. for example, right now I am listening to song that has no lyrics, it is just a symphonic tune from a video game I used to play (it sounds nerdy but wait for it).

this song is from a video game I played all the time when I was in the 8th grade and in listening to it, I feel as though I’ve travelled back in time (ironic that the game’s storyline was based on time travel heh heh). I feel like I’ve travelled back to the 8th grade when life was so much more simpler in so many ways. a time when my family was intact, when I had my dog, when I didn’t have to work to pay any bills, when the only thing I had to wory about was school dramatics. I want to just live in that time frame, to never leave and to simply be and remain happy. but as soon as the music stops, reality has set back in again and I know the truth. I’m dreaming about a time that once existed and will never exist again. and that truth must be accepted.

I guess that’s what makes us human. our mortality on earth and our requirement to deal with the ever changing state of our lives, where nothing is constant but change itself and the emotions that all of this invokes upon us. not only that but we have to learn to live with these emotions, as overpowering as they might be.

with each passing day is a new page. whenever time decides to bring in the winds of change, the pages are done and conclude the chapter. when all the chapters are done, so ends the story of our lives here on earth. it’s such a difficult and depressing concept to grasp but a concept that we must come to terms with nonetheless.

2,456,984,567,890 feelings running through my head right now. some of them are only normal to be feeling at this point in my life, others are feelings I am forced to deal with as a result of things I ‘ve said, done or will do, and the last of the feelings are feelings I must deal with as a result of the choices others that are close to me have made.

so this is my other big, long ramble of how I’m feeling and all of these realizations and philosophy’s that I’ve reached. boring I know but I feel better if I write out how I’m feeling. after all, what are blogs for? I know this entry is similar to my last one but still, new things were said so it can’t be that bad. anyways I’m off to bed.

ps. two years ago I warned of a killer snow storm approaching in one of my xanga entries (if you looks back, you might find it). don’t be fooled by these past sunny days with no snow. winter is coming for you. stay in your homes.

-brandon

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13 Comments
  1. Reply

    emo_loser11

    December 18, 2006

    great blog, hope life if going your way and your happy 🙂
    Talk to yea later..

  2. Reply

    emo_loser11

    December 18, 2006

    haha I can’t right is** going your way, there we go 🙂

  3. Reply

    Anonymous

    December 18, 2006

    yepp.. i wish things could be back the way they were…and now i’m about to get into some big thing about this so i’ll leave it at that.

    but even i don’t have to worry about all the stuff you do, yet i still wish things were back the way they were for more reasons than just family being intact and skyla and everything…

  4. Reply

    lyrical_symphony

    December 18, 2006

    dude, the storm totally is coming..

    i’m scared.

  5. Reply

    SsIiEeRrRrAa

    December 18, 2006

    haha yah they are defanitly a sweet band. and thanks for the comment .. uhm but i dont think i know you ? ? or maybee i do and im just being rediculouse haha

  6. Reply

    extremely_confused

    December 18, 2006

    Brandon.. You are an amazing writer…
    They never feel what i feel… I think almost everyone can relate..

  7. Reply

    taking_flyed

    December 19, 2006

    brandon, seriously this will not be the last time you will here this, but u r an amazing writer, someone who actually can relate to others, or who can relate to you. You could write a whole book with your philosophies……I do hope things are going to look up to you, sooner than later…..And with the storm coming you are probably right,in a philosopicaly way…. not just for some people but for many…. people that will face battles…battles for their life, for their believes, or for what they stand….but even if it comes i know there will be winners….talk to yah soon…

  8. Reply

    SsIiEeRrRrAa

    December 19, 2006

    hahah well yah i do know victor .. but i havnt talked to him in a while i mean i commented his page but he didnt comment back soo meh i dunno we went to herritage way back in the day haha … thats how i know him .. but yah anyhoo haha ..

  9. Reply

    SsIiEeRrRrAa

    December 19, 2006

    Haha uhm yep  in grade eight wich was like five years ago or four haha i dunno im gr 12 now soo ….

  10. Reply

    MinuetKiss

    December 24, 2006

    i liked that post, i think you should become a writer or a phycologist or something.
    we have to chill sometime, give me a call or text k?
    801-5701
    -jodi

  11. Reply

    Anonymous

    December 24, 2006

    Merry Christmas!

    i love you

  12. Reply

    lyrical_symphony

    January 6, 2007

    when the crap are you going to look at my new lyrics?

  13. Reply

    lyrical_symphony

    January 6, 2007

    thanks dawg

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